Over the past few weeks I have really had to deal with some intense situations, and alhamdulillah I’m glad they happened, because they made me realize some of the most important things I have ever known.

Firstly, to understand that everything happens for a reason truly brings the heart at ease, and the soul to accept the divine will of Allah, the Most High.

Secondly, I feel that people must realize that the true strength of a person lies within, in their imaan.

For it is imaan that harbors the passion to worship Allah, and without imaan, it is as if you are in a car with no gas, going nowhere.

So how does one attain this strength? Through the recognition of balance.

On the one side you have fear. Fear of Allah, fear of what certain instances and actions may lead you to commit. Fear must be instilled in the hearts of every believer, for without fear of Allah, there is no hesitance on the path to evil deeds.

On the other side comes the love of Allah. Loving the One who created you, who gave you life, allowed you to breathe, allowed you to enjoy these pleasures in dunya, allowed you to feel happiness, joy, love, compassion. These are only a fraction of the things Allah has given to us, yet the heart is rarely grateful.

What does it take to feel this love? To feel this fear? What does it take to reach that state of imaan?

To understand that Allah is your creator. To understand that Allah loves you, for Allah tests those who he loves.

And who has not been tested by Allah? Who has never been tested by Allah?

SubhanAllah, how Allah loves each person, though we neglect him everyday.

The Prophet (S) never went a second without thinking about Allah, never went a second without taking a step and wondering if Allah were to take his soul at that moment. At the times he ate he would be thinking whether or not he would choke because Allah wanted to take his soul at that moment.

SubhanAllah, how many times have I thanked Allah every morning when I wake up? Every time I lay in bed fighting myself to get up and do Fajr?

How many times have I gone to take an exam and not thought about Allah? How many times have I been simply driving and not thought about Allah?

Do we even deserve to be called Muslims?

By Allah, there was no human being that was a better example than the Prophet (S).

We listen to the new fiqh CD’s we’ve just bought and learn something new, or we get out of an Islamic lecture and want to spread our knowledge and think we are at a higher state of imaan simply because of that.

Yet we cannot even remember Allah for an hour straight every day without worrying about something so trivial in comparison.

We need to be afraid. We need to have this fear instilled in our hearts once more. No one wants to be dipped in the Hellfire for even a split second, no one.

To think that one dip in Hell is infinitely worse than any pain we have ever faced in this dunya, in truth we have never faced any fitnah in our lives.

Yet we complain, we backbite, we gossip, we let shaitan weave us into his spiderweb.

And we forget Allah.  Allahu Akbar.

We all have our weaknesses, we all fall to our knees once in a while, but to let ourselves fall and not pick ourselves up is a sin in itself.

Who are the people of Jannah? Allah mentions explicitly in the Qur’an.

The people of Jannah are the people who commit sins, and yet they turn back to Allah, no matter what.

These people do not let the tricks of shaitan fool them, the whispers that tell them they are  hypocrites, that they do not deserve to be called Muslims.

And subhanAllah, look at what Allah says about the people of Jannah in Surah Al-Imran.

Allah didn’t mention people who are in constant dhikr of Him, nor people who spend their lives doing good deeds, Allah states that the people of Jannah are people who have sinned, who turn back to Him in shame and ask for forgiveness.

How merciful is Allah? How loving is Allah?

SubhanAllah, Allah loves us more than our own mothers love us. How are we so blind?

Allow your heart to bow down to His glory, and let your soul grasp on to the rope of Allah.

May Allah increase us in our remembrance for him and our thanks to him, and reward us for our efforts in this life and the next. Ameen.

To myself before anyone else.

Planning is vital, no matter what the case.

As someone I know always says, goals mean nothing if you don’t have a plan.

We have to realize that yes, Allah above all else is the best of planners, but we must also realize that without planning, we defeat ourselves even before we begin.

Without plans, without goals, life will just sweep you up at your feet.

You need a plan or a goal. Everyone has one, even if you don’t think you do.

Do you want to go to Jannah? Hopefully yes. That’s a goal, isn’t it?

But what good is wanting to go to Jannah if you don’t have a plan for it?

Are you praying five times a day? If this isn’t happening you shouldn’t be concentrating on anything else. Forget all the differences of opinion on whatever minor or irrelevent issues are at hand. Complete what has been made obligitory on you first.

So set out a plan. Maybe you aren’t able to get up for fajr every morning. Write out a plan. Be consistent, stick with it.

Planning also comes under the basis of tying your camel.

If you have a hard exam in two days and you don’t study at all for it, don’t think Allah will help you.

You have to make some form of effort. Some way to show you are trying. Just do SOMETHING, because something is better than nothing.

Think of Musa (AS), why did Allah order him to hit his stick on the ground before allowing the seas to part?

Tell me, is there any relationship between the seas splitting and hitting a stick on a rock?

Think of Maryam (AS) when she was pregnant with Isa (AS), why did Allah order her to shake the tree so she could have food? Why would Allah make a pregnant woman in the pangs of birth shake a tree?

Of course Allah knows better than all of us that Maryam couldn’t shake the tree, but she tried, didn’t she? She made some kind of effort, didn’t she?

Therefore. make some effort to allow the blessings of Allah to be manifested. We cannot believe ourselves to be self-sufficient, for that is shirk in it of itself, but we can do our part and rely on Allah for help.

So don’t worry. Be patient, keep hope, stay motivated, and keep asking Allah, for we are nowhere without Him. Insha’Allah your path is made easier for you and your journey in this life is swift as can be.

I’m treading on the surface of a dream
Such distinct fragrances and emotions I can only feel
A world which none other can see
The solo has been fitted with a perfect duet harmony

Soaring through this aura of light
Something ruptures within
Colors gush forth like none ever witnessed
The pleasure of magnificence squeezes harder

The soul is swimming in your sea of beauty
Begging to drown in all your perfection
As I transfer the lifeblood into you
And now my heart is yours.

A day to remember.

Unbelievable, absolutely unbelievable.

Here in Florida, how could this be possible?

Hundreds of miles away from home, yet I feel as if my life just begun.

Life seems so surreal, so imaginative. After all I’ve done, after every single thing, I am rewarded with this?

A gift like no other, precious like a jewel.

I am not deserving of such. I cried in disbelief and confusion, what have I done to deserve something so grand?

Joy ruptures out of me at every pore. My body is restraining my soul from jumping out with ecstasy.

The excitement is overwhelming, enchanting.

It is in these moments I now fully realize, impossible is truly nothing.

Never limit the power of Allah, ever.

Never limit yourself to anything. If you believe Allah can allow anything to happen, believe it.

Don’t hesitate to ask for things in dua. Don’t hesitate to take chances. Don’t hesitate to take opportunities when they come knocking on your door.

Understand that we as humans do not know what is best for us. We must come to accept this fact. We only ask Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful, what is best for us.

And He will grant it to us if we ask, if that is best for us.

Do not defeat yourself before the race has even begun.

Praise be to Allah.

It is remarkable in such a strange sense the way humans were created. We have a need for everything. We have certain characteristics of ourselves that must be fulfilled, or we become agonized and helpless.

Dunya, which is this complete state of reality we are living in, is able to control us in the most subtle ways.

You are dunya, I am dunya. Our entire physical existence is dunya. Our souls and the unseen are what makes us unique. Our emotions, our thoughts, the essence of what we are. These things are independent of dunya, though they reside in it at present time.

It was once said that dunya is like a farm. You have to utilize dunya for yourself, for your own benefit. But for what, you ask?

Simple. For worshipping Allah.

It is for that reason we were created, was it not?

However, dunya is able to manipulate us in ways we do not even know, or cannot even understand until we are told.

An example can be seen from the famous singer Aaliyah. This was a woman who died in a plane crash on the way back from making a music video off in Cuba.

On the way back, while they were loading the plane, the pilot warned them about what they were doing. He knew that the plane would not be able to take so much weight, and yet they kept on loading the private jet with bags and bags.

The plane crashed. Reason? Weight. Everyone on the plane died.

This is a perfect example of how dunya can engulf you in its flames, so much so that you become one with the fire itself, blind to everything around you.

Imagine travelers on a ship who have reached a desert island.

The first group of people get off the ship, take a look around, like what they see, but know that they must go back, or the ship will leave them.

The second group of people love the island and many of the things in it. At the last minute they remember the ship is leaving, and here they come, strolling along with the many things they had found, almost missing the ship. Because they brought so many things, the ship was slower, and made their travel more of a hardship.

The third group of people became lost in the wonder of this island, so much so that they forgot all about the ship, and were left there to stay and fend for themselves. Sooner or later, a typhoon came and they were destroyed, just like that.

Own, or owned by dunya? Which category would you want to fit in?

Whom do you serve?

Who do you think of when you raise your hands and say “Allahu Akbar?”

What are you thinking when your face is flat on the ground?

Are your limbs just making movements?

Are your lips just moving by themselves?

Whom do you serve?

I feel strange at times, so strange. Feelings come and go, epiphanies which shock me, leaving me dazed in a matter of seconds.

I stop everything, and think, “Is this real?”

I look at my hand, the creases in my skin. Veins, bones, skin. Organic matter. What is it all?

Walking, talking, acting the way we act, it feels so fake, so unreal to me. I cannot believe I am actually here at times, much like the feeling of being lost at sea, or being a fish out of water.

Consciousness is what we truly are. Soul, essence, vibe, whatever you want to call it. Moving my hand, laughing, all of this stems from thoughts, thoughts from the mind.

To think, without our soul, we are nothing, just robots without a battery, powered off.

Seeing a dead person laying there, completely lifeless, it is truly shocking.

In this perspective you have to wonder, is a non-thinking mind clinically dead?

Beware of this dunya, for it will destroy you if you do not tread lightly.

“There must be some way out of here,”
Screamed the slave to the breeze,
“There’s too much confusion,
I can’t get no relief.”

“These people don’t see the signs,
Blind like sheep on this Earth.
None of them ever take the time
To know what any of it is really worth.”

“No reason to get excited now,”
The breeze, it kindly spoke.
“There are many here among us
Who feel that life is but a joke”

“But you and I, we’ve been through that,
And know that this is not our fate.
So let us not talk falsehood now,
For the hour is getting late.”

All along these prison bars
Real truth is spread thin and few
While all the skeptics came and went
As did the righteous servants too

And outside in the distance
Release came as subtle as an owl
That winged entity grew ever closer
As happiness began to slowly howl

Just when I think I have things figured out, life decides to clench its fists, pop its knuckles, and punch you right in the face. It’s so unexpected, so surprising. You don’t even know why the hell you got punched in the first place.

I end up on the floor, my cheekbone literally feels like it’s fallen off my face. I can taste the blood inside my mouth from the ruptured tissue, draining down and around my throat, forced to swallow.

And here I lay now, on the floor in shock. What the hell just happened? Did I seriously just get punched in the face? I lay there, letting my head spin in circles round and round, staring at the sky above.

It feels nice to lay on the ground once in a while, feels really comfortable for some reason.

I don’t want to get up. It’s easy enough just laying here. Why should I have to stand back up and keep walking?

Stuck in this state, I still can’t understand how this is happening to me. I feel like I’ve just become someone else, within seconds. A switch was pushed, and now out of nowhere, I’ve appeared, exuding darkness every which way I go, and yet I do not feel this way at all.

Getting up is the hardest thing, and I still haven’t stood up yet. I put both hands on the floor, attempting to push myself up, but I keep falling on my face.

Why do I lack the energy? What’s wrong with me? Is it because the motivation is gone? I still cannot bring myself to understand the horrid phenomenon that has just engulfed my life.

Is it that I just don’t care anymore? I never thought I would find myself in such a position again.

I never thought that this shadow would return. Now it seems as though it was haunting me for a year, waiting for opportune moments to meld into me.

Hope is there, always. Hope never fails to give up, the rope still swaying back and forth, waiting for me to get a tight grip. And yet, I keep slipping off every time I try.

What is it that I need? How is it that I am so weak, so useless? Each breath of mine I feel is just wasted, no purpose for even being in this infatuated made up paradise that I continue to embrace.

Weakness. Such pathetic weakness. Sometimes it seems as though there is nothing to live for, or strive for. You become lost in your daze of confusion, wandering endlessly, searching for a way to stay on that rope no matter what.

But this is the greatest test of faith, is it not? The reason to believe in that which we cannot see, cannot hear, cannot touch. Faith itself, an ultimate test in understanding that we are meaningless little rodents running on a wheel that never stops, until our heart gives away.

And yet, knowing the Truth, knowing the only thing you should be doing at this point in time is worshiping the One who created you, we still seem to falter.

Why can we not force our brains to act on this simple concept is beyond me. Ignoring the simplest commandment of all, knowing that if it is not fulfilled, there is a seat in Hell, just waiting there.

But we still choose to ignore it. It enrages me at times. Agonizes me. It claws and shreds inside me. The voice in my head tells me to just give up, and I listen, for one reason or another.

Just kill me now, for I don’t want to increase my sins any longer. How can one be so calm when disobeying his Creator?

Stuck in this alternate universe, dead on the surface, but screaming underneath.

What is it then? Without help, without an environment, am I really this pointless? Mixed thoughts trouble my mind, one saying to hold on, to never give up, the other to just forget it all, relax and never worry about anything anymore. And the sides have continued to flip back and forth continuously, for as long as I can remember.

It’s pointless to help others when I can’t even help myself. Practice what you preach has definitely made it’s point, and for now I choose to staple my mouth and fingers shut.

Listening to that voice keeps me going though, the soft tender whisper of eternal hope, knowing that no matter how bad it becomes, how dark the heart may be, the door will always remain unlocked, waiting for me to grab the handle and pry it open.

Death in this state would be the ultimate insult, yet death never seems real even when it stares you in the face.

I beg, please take me away from this technological deathtrap that keeps me plugged in to the matrix. Please let it all vanish, let it be destroyed, let the stone age begin once again.

We will never be grateful unless we have tasted the pains of hardship. We live like kings in this garden of eden, yet we still find the means to complain of every single irrelevant detail that ensues our lives, which again, are completely meaningless.

So I plead on my knees, let us live as we are meant to live, for we do not deserve to be a creation in this state.

What do I need now, I don’t even know. Love paints and splatters happiness on the walls of my heart, but it too is faced with crumble and defeat, so much so that I fail to even recognize the emotion anymore.

Where is joy in this prison? I cannot find it anywhere I look, except in those souls who believe as I believe, who feel as I feel, and now even they have decided to meld in the shadows, leaving me to wither and decay.

I’m gasping for breath in this sick ocean of despair, clinging to the last ounce of faith I am not even worthy of having. It makes me want to vomit in disgust, to think that a human could stoop to such a level, and just imagine, I would have never cared about it when I was in this state two years earlier.

It is hard to believe that everything happens for a reason when something like this occurs. In my mind, I know it is just another test, but it’s hard convincing a brain that is reluctant to accept the facts.

But I fail to remember hope. Hope.

Slowly, slowly but surely, the blood will be wiped off, the dust will be patted down, and I will take that first step once again, back at square one. Insha’Allah.

Just think back to your younger years. Maybe you were practicing back then, maybe not.

Maybe you were a troubled child? Depressed? Got too angry?

Maybe you tried drugs? How about drink alcohol?

Maybe you once had an intimate relationship with someone?

How did you do in school? Were you nerdy or geeky?

Who were your friends? Did they have an influence on you?

The point I’m trying to get at is obvious by the title. Everything that has ever happened to you in your life as you know it, has a reason.

We may not see the effects of these reasons, or the meanings behind them, but sometimes when we look back at the past, we think,

“Wow… I can’t beleive I was like that…” or “Who would have thought I would be the person I am today…”

Every single person you have ever met in your life, you have met for a reason. Every random stranger, every homeless person you’ve given money to on the side of the highway, every word you’ve ever typed on a keyboard, every step you’ve ever taken.

Everything. Literally everything, happens for a reason.

The smallest grain of sand in the deepest part of the ocean we may have never even discovered has a reason, a purpose for being there, just as you and everyone else on this planet has a purpose for being here.

Think of it, Allah didn’t have to create you. Why did He? What is the point in being here then? Allah created you for a reason, a purpose. To live this life in ignorance of this plain and simple fact and not give thanks is a direct insult to the One Who created you.

This is the ultimate understanding of the Qadr of Allah.

You have to understand that nothing is random. Nothing is meaningless. You are living your own storybook, which is being unfolded every second of every passing day.

Sure, you may not like things that happen to you. Maybe you fail a test, or you broke your leg, or the person you proposed to said no.

Nonetheless, you have to know that even these things have a purpose. You realize in time, just as I have as well as many other people, that Allah knows what is best for you. He is the All Knowing, All Wise.

He created us, don’t forget that. He gave us life. In reality, we shouldn’t be doing anything other than worshipping Allah, locked in sujood for eternity, but because of his mercy, He’s given us so much leisure as His creation.

Allah does not burden a soul more than it can bear. Know that you will be tested over, and over, and over again, even until your last breath of your life in this prison.

So once again, I ask you to think back to the past. Haven’t you learned lessons from your experiences?

If you’ve come from a non-practicing background back into Islam, think of all the past incidents that have led you to this path in your life.

Every single aspect of your former life in darkness led you to the truth. SubhanAllah, Allah is truly The Greatest, and He is the Only Changer of Hearts.

So if you stub your toe on the way out of bed in the morning, or get stuck in bumper to bumper traffic, know that it’s already been written.

And whatever befalls the believer is that which is best for him.

My love you came to me
When seemingly, life had begun
Little did I know then
Where this would go, when this begun
Once I was free to fly, I never promised anything
This may well be goodbye

Although you hold me close
I feel retention arise
Just as a hint of fear
Like subtle clouds in summer skies
Once in the moonlight
I can’t explain, and I don’t know
Someday we may reunite

So rest now please, don’t you cry
Believe me, I do this for you
Heed my decision now, I will be gone tomorrow noon
My tale has just begun, nothing can take my faith away
In my quest for The One

For love means nothing to me
If there is a higher place to be

You’re standing on a strip of land. The beach, grass, whatever you want it to be.

You can see, right there in front of you, a vast river. It seems like it stretches for miles upon miles. Thunderous waves crash over each other, whirlpools are present in some areas, while other areas are as calm as can be.

Now you are told you have to cross this river, filled with its many dangers as well as its soothing beauty.

You think to yourself, how the heck would I ever survive this? You wonder, well maybe you could get at least halfway, but you’ll just be exhausted and end up getting sucked into one of those pools. If that happened, it’d be almost impossible to climb back out and continue.

But here’s the catch. You are now told that you may pick one person, any one person, from among the people on this strip of land, to come with you on this journey to the other side.

You think wow, that definitely helps. Having someone else with you would really increase the chance of getting to the other side rather than just going by yourself.

You look around, and you realize that all of these people around you are people you have come to know within some time in your life. That person helped you out with organizing this event, that person volunteered with you, that person you talk to very seldomly.

Your family is gone, nowhere in sight. No parents, sisters, brothers, or cousins. Probably on another island or strip of land like this one.

And just like that, out of nowhere, you make another discovery. All of these people on the island, are all members of the opposite gender. Some are your age, some are slightly younger, and some are slightly older, yet you know all of them from your life.

And now the voice tells you one last thing. You have only one day to choose who you will take with you. The only thing you have to go by is what you know about these people, that’s it.

So you look at all of them, then back at the immense river, then back at them again.

You spend hours just thinking to yourself, who am I going to take?

And while you remain deep in thought, you take one more glance across the river, and you see something.

Green. Just a green aura coming out from the horizon. Different colors, different skies. Then it hits you. You’re journeying to Jannah.

Jannah is your destination. Eager with excitement, you look back at the people around you on the island once again.

Suddenly, the only real thing you begin to think about is, who will lead me to Jannah?

Looks, which were an important factor for you, do not seem to matter nearly enough anymore. Money? Status? You could care less about these things.

You need someone who knows how to swim, and knows how to swim really, really well. If they know that the destination is Jannah, and they’ve been preparing, they should even know which routes to take while both of you are swimming.

You can easily avoid those whirlpools, and probably even those choppy waters that will slow you down.

And now you look at each individual again, with a new mindset. Your expectations have now been lowered by a lot. You know the only thing that really matters is just getting the both of you to the other side of the river.

But then you think, this journey is going to be really, really long. You’re going to need someone to keep your spirits high, someone who will keep that motivation going.

Then another thought, they have to have the same swimming style as you. What if they don’t want to take a certain route that you want to take? That would only cause more problems. You have to find someone that swims like you.

They have to complement your own swimming style. Only then would you both be able to make this epic journey to Jannah together, hand in hand.

So, looking at the crowd, you narrow it down by a huge margin. Only two people remain now.

How are you going to decide between them? You can only take one with you, so which one is going to lead you there with the most ease?

Both of them know how to navigate the waters, both of them seem like people you could spend a long time with, both of them even complement your swimming style.

If you could, you would choose both of them. But the rules remain the same. You can only choose one.

So now you look to the other things, and sure enough after a few hours, you make your decision.

And off you both go, wandering in the river towards Jannah with nothing but each other.

The river symbolizes life, or dunya. The whirpools and choppy waters are nothing but tests and tribulations you will face during the course of your swim. Jannah is your destination.

The way you swim symbolizes who you are. What are your interests, what do you like to do, what your goals are, etc.

Finding a person who is compatible with the way you swim is vital, and will only prove to benefit you more because their personality is simliar to yours, therefore complementing each other.

Thinking to yourself, if you only had one day to do this, who would you pick?

The person you pick is the person you should be searching for. Maybe it might not be the exact person you would want to swim with, but the essence of them, their soul, is what you seek.

Remember, not many of the other factors count so much in this journey, because your end result is one that only depends on one thing: How well you swim.

Just take a moment to think about it. Who would you pick?